Quote
Glossy and rowdy / and indistinguishable. / The deep muscle of the world.
— Mary Oliver, “Crows”
Song
Rental Love by Lake Street Dive.
I think Rachel Price is one of the best vocalists working today. She throws down but does it so gracefully and so well. By the way, Greg H., what do you think of the Beatles influence on this one? I’d say it’s quite heavy, and beautifully so. This is sublime. Take a listen. It’ll bring something to the room.
I watched
Reservation Dogs on Netflix. How did I miss this until now? It’s so excellent — the acting is perfect, I think the inclusion of supernatural elements is a wonderful and mysterious detail, and though it isn’t necessarily uplifting, it feels good. It’s right up my alley — medicine wisdom, spiritual guidance, incredible characters, and humor.
Book
I’m nearing the end of Margaret Renkl’s The Comfort of Crows. It’s getting to the point that I’ll only allow myself a few essays per day because I don’t want it to end. I guess I could just start it over when I finish it, but I suspect it will be placed on the nightstand next to her Late Migrations, which is a treasure, so it’s at hand in quiet moments before bedtime, or upon waking, if I have time to sneak out of bed for a cup of coffee and then sneak back under the covers for one of my favorite things — sipping a terrific cup of coffee while reading before the rest of the house wakes up.
I have a small stack from which to choose what I read next. I’m learning toward Ann Patchett’s new one, Tom Lake. But I’m also considering two unread Maggie O’Farrell books. We shall see.
Thing
The Breville Citrus Press Pro.
This falls under the heading of “something Allison would never buy for herself but that Hayes thinks is cool, so is okay to have.” An electric citrus juicer? Well, yes. And it is the coolest thing. See — I’ve never really like the orange juice you buy in the store. You probably don’t really like it either. But I promise you, you would love a navel orange, freshly squeezed. Middle age is all about discovery and the rest of my life may very well shape up to be the best of my life.
My father had this thing he’d say whenever anyone had a sniffle or worse when we were little. Did you drink your orange juice? I wonder what he’d think of this sitting in my kitchen. There’s plenty of orange juice in the mornings these days.
What I’m wearing
Warning — clothes talk. Skip ahead if you don’t care.
It was a blue velvet weekend. I joined Hayes and company for two more installments of his Grateful for Christmas tour, and getting dressed for them was fun. I don’t really shop unless it’s to update basics. I instead take a collector’s approach — which means I’m just always on the lookout for something special. I’ve been studying clothes and style in some way or another since I was a small child, and I’ve learned along the way that though it’s necessary to have quality basics with which to build a wardrobe, once you’ve done that (and know how to keep them updated and fresh by keeping current on where to get staples) it can be all about building off of your core look, which is built on those staples, and pushing the boundaries as far as feels natural and cool to keep things fresh. For instance, blue velvet registers as fancy and formal, but it doesn’t have to be. It depends on what you do with it. I throw things together that don’t “go together” all the time. A worn out denim shirt and tons of mala beads takes it luxe hippie. A striped tee and whimsical loafers takes it toward Alber Elbaz when he was at Lanvin. The pants I wore on Friday night (Saint Laurent), I bought on deep sale at Nordstrom (that’s one of my tricks — I put my favorite brands in my account profiles so I can be notified when I can get higher end items that I can’t afford to (and probably wouldn’t) pay full price for. They’re incredible — unforgivably cut but still flattering and sleek. Something I will have for the rest of my life if I manage to stay the same size (no pressure). The suit I wore last night I scored on The Real Real and had altered (another trick — buy vintage or lightly worn consignment pieces so that your CPW [cost per wear] makes sense then have them tailored). I wouldn’t have been comfortable paying full price for it either, but I’m so glad I have it. I love a suit, and a velvet one is just heavenly.
What I’m cooking
At this moment, a pot of Rancho Gordo Bayo Gordo Beans. I woke up craving something I cooked and it’s cold in Nashville, plus we need some sustenance around here with all the traveling, so beans felt like the perfect choice.
I grew up on pots of beans and I’d be hard pressed to name something I like to eat more. And there is arguably no better food for a human being to eat. I was a vegetarian for years, and though I’m not now, I still like to eat mostly things that grow out of the ground, so when I was introduced to Rancho Gordo I quickly signed up for the waiting list for their bean club. It took a while to get member status, but now I look forward to opening my specially selected box of beans every quarter. Y’all, these are hands down the best beans I’ve ever eaten. If you’re not a bean eater, trust me when I tell you that Rancho Gordos have converted more than one doubter.
Favorite Photo I Took This Week
That’s an echocardiogram of my heart, which is normal and healthy. I feel relief and a series of paintings coming on.
Where I went
Let’s see — I tried to stay at home as much as possible, but there were medical appointments and therapy, friends and favors and more friends and coffee huddles and tarot pulls, there was spontaneous background singing in a studio filled with women, there were errands, there was the Nashville Airport, Dallas Love Airport, a hotel that got on my nerves, The Kessler Theatre (love the Kessler), a charming restaurant called Beckley 1115, the same airports in reverse, and home again.
Home again is the best part of that paragraph.
What I did
I got up early most days. I got started decorating the house for the holidays (almost finished). I shopped for gifts. I painted. I worked on a crochet and leather collar I dreamt up. I made music. I saw friends. I read. I unpacked and packed and am about to unpack again. I did all of the things that go with packing and unpacking and packing and unpacking. I wrapped my left knee in kinesiology tape every day. I did yoga 3 times. I’m pretty sure I ate four quarts of blueberries. I lit incense and honored my rituals, I prayed, I meditated. I rested.
Something wonderful I noticed
How well self-discipline works. Like I always say, I have a tendency to sink into negative thinking more than I’d like. I can spin out from great to doom in less than 60 seconds. But mind control is all about skill and training. None of us come here knowing how to regulate ourselves. We must be taught. I’m so relieved that I have started to be able to catch myself before the spin out happens. Having boundaries around what I can and can’t do, what I can and can’t think about, and what I will and won’t give of myself is still so new, but I can feel a habit of guiding my insides toward the positive forming. It’s a powerful thing.
What brought me joy
Experiencing beauty and delighting in it.
Prayer
Thank you, Great Spirit, for giving me the strength to let go of everything I cannot control, which is everything outside of myself.
Intention for the week to come
May I be present before I am concerned with being anything else.
May I meet others with kindness and acceptance.
May I feel confident enough to be flexible.
May I remember that this time of year is about being grateful for my blessings.
Something I’m thinking about
Spaciousness. How to create it in all the ways — in my time, in my environment, in my work, in my relationships. You can’t dance if you have no room.
Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. — Buddha
Habit
Constantly editing. I crave that spaciousness that I’m thinking about. I don’t want to live as a monk and never will — y’all know I love beautiful things too much for that. But I’m becoming a person who wants every object around me to be carefully considered and simply not there if it doesn’t need to be or doesn’t bring some type of meaning or joy to my daily life. It’s a lifelong process.
Wishes
That I recognize every opportunity to feel joy, and that I take each one.
That my fellow creatures do that too.
That you all are content and well.
That you will forward this to one person you think might like it.
These pieces are available in the Autotelic Shop. I’m sorry to say I cannot offer international shipping.
Have a wonderful, peaceful, joyous week. And thank you for supporting my work here at The Autotelic.
Peace. Love.
Allison
There are first edition copies of I Dream He Talks to Me and Blood in the shop. I will sign each copy that is ordered. If you would like it personalized, please send an email with your order number and the name you would like on the signature page to allisonmoorercontact@gmail.com.
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As always, I look forward to your posts. The fact that you posted is enough proof that you did not recieve an unwanted trip to Oz last evening. I hope those lives that weren't so fortunate are able to become whole as soon as is possible. Even though here in The Motor City there is no clue weather wise that it is Christmas season, it is still pretty weird that there are such storms in the middle of December. I hope that this coming week is a good one. That your travels are safe. That your loved ones are healthy. I love you. Keep on truckin'
"You can't dance if you have no room."
Glad you made it through the storm. That stuff is headed this way.