SUNDAY SELFIE SERIES #65
Michael Maren
SUNDAY SELFIE SERIES #65: The extraordinary Michael Maren.
I met Michael in January 2020 when I was asked by his extraordinary wife, Dani Shapiro, to be a guest on her terrific podcast, Family Secrets. I was nervous about meeting Michael and Dani that day — I’d admired them both from afar for so long — but when I arrived at the theatre on a late Monday afternoon, they both, with their kindness and grace, immediately put me at ease. That was certainly enough to make my admiration for them grow deeper. But what struck me most that day, and what sticks with me still, was the way that they navigated all that was going on around them. As publishers, publicists, photographers, sound men, directors, and assistants all buzzed about getting ready to go live that evening, Michael stuck close by — taking amazing photographs, checking on Dani to see if she needed anything, making conversation with me — he moved as the perfect partner to Dani and together they were poetry in motion — the kind of poetry that can only be created by a combination of long-held assuredness and the humble acceptance that each day will bring more jaw-dropping wonder.
It was inspiring. I walked away wanting that sort of knowing in my own marriage.
For all of our professional accomplishments, for all our outward bravery, I am always most impressed by those who are successful at relationship, for it is there that we learn the most about ourselves. It is there that we are tested on a level that doesn’t exist on any other kind of adventure. It is there that we dragon slayers and seekers, however tough, meet the ultimate challenge of having to soften, which is sometimes the hardest thing we ever have to do. For whatever reason, I got to see those things in Michael that January day and though I’m terribly impressed by his on paper accomplishments, it is ultimately his humanity that makes me so very proud to know him.
1. What has humbled you more than anything else?
I was going to say surviving cancer two years ago but in reality it was going to Kenya in the Peace Corps after college. I started with a vague notion that my 21-year-old self had something to teach but quickly understood that a vast universe lay beyond my experience and understanding. If I just observed and listened, wonders and wisdom would reveal themselves.
2. Do you feel like you’ve gotten a good education?
I was a horrible student, easily distracted from the curriculum by my own passions and interests. I always read a lot, but not always from the assigned texts. I never studied journalism but had a rewarding 15-year career as a journalist. I never went to film school, but I’ve been studying film in one way or another since as a kid I spent my Saturday afternoons at the 25-cent matinee in my hometown. I’m now completing my second film as a writer/director. So yes, I’ve had — and continue to have — a wonderful education, even eventually reading many of those books I avoided when I was in school.
3. Do you believe that forgiveness benefits the forgiver or the transgressor?
For those times when I have transgressed, hurt others or just royally screwed up, forgiveness and understanding have done nothing to ease that sick, gnawing feeling in my stomach. Forgiving others, however, is a liberating act of empathy.
4. What is your proudest accomplishment?
Having a loving marriage that is a true partnership in every way and together raising a son who is curious, kind, and empathic. I don’t see any of that as the result of happenstance.
5. How would you like to live out your golden years?
I don’t see my golden years as any different from all my other years. I want to keep working, writing, improving, making movies, for as long as I’m able. Going back to the first question, cancer taught me that one can’t count on even having those golden years. All years are golden.
❤️❤️❤️
Nice