SUNDAY SELFIE SERIES #60
Rick Brantley
SUNDAY SELFIE SERIES #60: The adroit Rick Brantley. I’ve known this fellow for several years. He opened the first Sissy shows when “Not Dark Yet,” came out in 2017. And though he is a bit of an enigma — always appearing then disappearing like some slippery southern soul singing anti-superhero — he’s always a gentleman, and sometimes that’s all I need to know. Plus, he sings and writes like the devil. Makes sense — his Daddy was a preacher.
1. What has humbled you more than anything else?
Leaving. And being left.
A couple years ago I decided on a whim to leave town for a while. I’d end up being gone a year. Ostensibly, I set out to start a book but the truth is I was lost. I was wrestling with some things I couldn’t pin down and most days I could feel thunderheads crowding up every corner of waking life. So, I packed up my dog Patti and started driving. Santa Fe. St. Augustine. Peterborough, Ontario. Dublin, Georgia. Anywhere but here. And guess what happened? And everyone forgot me. Out of sight and out of mind, right? I don’t mean that in a bad way either. I just wasn’t HERE so I wasn’t THERE, in their hearts and minds. The phone stopped ringing. And somewhere along the line, I came to understand and accept that. And that stark reminder that, it turns out, the whole world does NOT revolve around me...that humbled the hell out of me. I’m glad it did.
2. Do you feel like you’ve gotten a good education?
Not formally, no. I grew up in very small religious schools and in a very small, inward looking-only community. Didn’t last too long in college either.
That said, my whole life has been one long education, for good or ill. Mostly good. I’ve seen precious things I’d never dreamed I’d see. Met fascinating people of all walks, colors, creeds, orientations etc all over the world. I’ve seen darkness but I’m mostly lucky to be awash with light, if I’m not too stubborn to see and feel it. I hope I never stop being able to learn a little every day. And I think maybe I’d like to go back to school one day and study literature or something, just to have an excuse to sit around and read sunup to sundown.
3. Do you believe that forgiveness benefits the forgiver or the transgressor?
The forgiver. Anger, hate, resentment are corrosive. They eat you up if you hold them down.
Also, I’m a big believer in people, as pessimistic as I may sound at times. I’ve met very few people who set out to take advantage of, or hurt someone else, or who are just plain old assholes. Most folks wound other folks in my view, because they don’t know how not to sometimes. So, in that regard, it’s a little easier for me to see and accept others' mistakes and try to find grace for them. And I can’t be beholden to someone else’s pain anymore than they can be for mine. I find the greatest benefit in trying to be a forgiver.
4. What is your proudest accomplishment?
This is going to sound silly. During my time in the wilderness a couple years ago I mentioned above, I spent a few weeks at a friend’s place in New Mexico. One day she calls me up and asks me if I could rebuild a stone wall that had fallen down in the back courtyard. Without thinking or inspecting the wall I obliged. Then I walked outside and this thing was huge! 60-80 lb stones just lying in the dirt. Add to that that I don’t know a damn thing about stone masonry or whatever. But I went to Home Depot and got a shitload of concrete and a couple tools and started...trying. Every morning for thirty days I’d have a cup of tea and a handful of cheese curds (gross for breakfast I know), strip down to my shorts and boots (it was summer in Santa Fe and hot as hell) and wrestle with that damn wall. Every day I sweat and cursed and got cement in my beard and ruined my favorite boots and killed my back and broke a couple of toes and lost a thumbnail and on and on. But I built that wall back up better than before. And somewhere in there I spackled some of my ego and a few demons into that behemoth and when it was done, I cried. Out of relief. Out of pride.
I love that wall. It’s still standing. And it will be long after I’m gone I hope.
5. How would you like to live out your golden years?
Tending bar at the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park, CO maybe, writing a bad Elmore Leonard knock-off, watching the sun sink over the Rockies with my partner and a couple of dogs every night and counting satellites til it’s time for bed. See, I’m really a romantic at heart?
This one was special. Lots of connection here. Thanks, Allison!
I always enjoy and learn from these. I might even cite these as part of my answer to "2. Do you feel like you’ve gotten a good education?" They keep me feeling connected. Thank you!