Questions + Answers

2022 Number 4

Hi Substack friends. I hope you enjoy this question and answer series, which I hope to post weekly, on Fridays. It means the world to me to have you here, so thank you again for joining me, and thank you for providing these great new questions. I’ll be answering them in the order they were received.

If you’d like to contribute a question, go to the post dated Feb 7, 2022 and leave it there.

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Thank you, Stephen C., for this great question.

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How excited are you about your upcoming shows with Shelby? Can you write a bit about the differences between performing solo, performing with fellow artists, and performing with someone as intimately close to you as your sissy? Wish y'all were coming to Atlanta.

Dear Stephen,

I feel most at home performing when I’m doing it with my sister. And having said that, I am most comfortable in a general sense when collaborating and not going it alone. Maybe that stems from being the younger sister, the harmonizing sister, instead of traditionally being the lead singer. Maybe it’s just my nature to feel more comfortable in a collaborative or support role rather than in a solo setting because I don’t consider myself a natural performer. I’m an artist through and through, but not necessarily someone eager to be on stage in front of people.

Singing with my sister feels very natural, but even though it’s second nature, it’s demanding both physically and emotionally. Sometimes I surprise people when I suggest that singing is an athletic event. That sweat you see sometimes? It doesn’t always come from the heat of the lights. Sometimes we sweat because we get worked up. My sister and I both sing from our guts — sometimes it seems we sing from our toes — so we’re tired after a show. It’s a great tired, though, and it’s nice to share that feeling with someone who understands what going to deep places requires. We have a particular depth with each other that can’t be explained, but I find the understanding that exists between other performers and me miraculous as well. When you know, you know. And when you know someone else knows, it’s a relief.

Collaborating can go in any direction imaginable. Sometimes it’s great. Sometimes it isn’t. I’m almost always down for the experience, though, and try to bring professionalism, heart, and joy to whatever I’m called to lend myself to. The best thing about growing up in a musical family is learning to be a part of a group, whether just singing harmony or being in a band. You have to be able to listen to be a good collaborator. That rule applies in most relationships, right?

AM

3.18.22

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To be nobody but yourself in a world that’s doing its best to make you somebody else, is to fight the hardest battle you are ever going to fight. Never stop fighting. -e.e.cummings