My Sunday List
February 11, 2024
Words
No matter where you begin, read anything for five hours a day and you will soon be knowing.
and
Meek young men grow up in libraries believing it their duty to accept views which Cicero, which Locke, which Bacon have given, forgetful that Cicero, Locke, and Bacon were only young men in libraries when they wrote those books.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
Song
I’m all over the new Norah Jones record.
Visionary Jones (curated by Don Was)
I think this will be on repeat this year. I’m sitting here wondering if Ms. Jones has ever made anything I don’t like? I can’t think of it if she has. We’re lucky to live in the time of the free-spirited popular music we’re hearing these days. There’s such a delightful variety and most of us have access to most of it. But it’s interesting to note that the more things change, the more they stay the same. No matter how we innovate — I don’t think we’ll ever create anything that does the work of a great song. AI might be efficient, but it will never be able to make stardust. Only beating hearts can do that.
I watched
Capote vs The Swans.
Episode 3 of The Swans. Goodness gracious, these empty, rotten people. The performances are great though, aren’t they?
H. and I are watching the Apple TV series Masters of the Air, which is wonderful. But sometimes the sight of Austin Butler makes me catch my breath because there’s something about him that looks so much like my late stepson. Nevertheless, I’m enjoying it — I loved Band of Brothers as well, and this show was created by the same team. And Callum Turner is magnetic.
Book
I’m spending time with the Nepo book almost every day, and I’m almost halfway finished. I get deeper and deeper into the rhythm of the words. My copy is starting to look like it’s seen years instead of weeks. The latest words I’ve read over and over:
Deep listening requires letting go of our internal argument with the world. Before we can truly listen, we must exhaust ourselves of our assumptions. In truth, if we are to ever glimpse the world outside the stubborn certainty of our minds, we have to put down our ready answer to everything. This necessitates an inner discipline so that I don’t finish your sentence in my mind, or search my storehouse of opinions for a rebuttal or defense of the world as I see it. Letting go of my internal argument with the world means not pushing off of everything that comes my way. It requires my looking at you as a sudden fish that has surfaced from the deep. It requires bringing you water rather than my judgments.
That is so rich. Recognizing and connecting what usually happens in the mind when someone else is speaking (getting ready to interpret and retort) as a barrier to listening is exactly the point. We think we’re listening, but we mostly block everything that we don’t already know. We seek to confirm our bias. We are willfully blind so we don’t have to do the hard work of unraveling our cognitive dissonance. We’d prefer to stay comfortable, even though we know we can’t grow that way. Growing involves pain. But so does the rot that sets in if you always surround yourself with only what you know and think you’re sure of.
I also started Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe last night. I wanted a sort of companion for Seven Thousand Ways to Listen and I find it comforting and wonderful, even exciting, that my eyes landed on this book, one I’ve had in the to-be-read stack for at least a year. I wasn’t even sure what it was about. Turns out, it’s about listening too. That’s a sign in itself. And I watch them.
Valentine’s Day gifts so far
What I’m wearing
What I’m cooking
I made the Cheesy Green Chile Bean Bake again. I also made my first real Chicken Paillard, which I was pretty happy with for a first attempt. I used pre-sliced chicken breasts so I wouldn’t have to butterfly them, and I added caperberries (a bit obsessed with these strong little bursts of goodness), blistered cherry tomatoes, and served it over sautéed baby spinach. My vinaigrette was pretty passable. Quick, easy, and healthy. And quite good!
Favorite Photo I Took This Week
A flat white in a mug from San Miguel. Maybe y’all don’t know I honed my barista skills at Fido, a coffeehouse down the street, and I’ve been practicing again since we got a wonderful home coffee machine at the end of 2023.
Where I went
I got to stay home. It was wonderful.
What I did
I’m happy to report it was a calm week. I think my heart and nervous system settled a little because of no travel — a good thing to remember. I feel like I could while away the hours in my studio for days on end and not need much from the outside world, and I do have those days here and there — I had a few this week, but what I love to feel is balanced and like I’m getting just enough of everything I need, which includes social interactions, conversation, etc. It’s never about achieving something that looks like I might’ve used to think it should, but rather allowing myself to be natural. I sketched and painted, I went to the studio and worked on music, I finished a few projects, and continued to move furniture around and clean cabinets.
What I made
Something wonderful I noticed
I see cardinals all the time.
I think my plants know that I’m talking to them.
What brought me joy
The knowledge that John Henry was in a luxury suite with its own private hot tub on the outlaw country cruise. This boy has it figured out. He is deluxe.
Prayer
Thank you, Great Spirit, for giving me the strength to let go of everything I cannot control, which is everything outside of myself.
Intention for the week to come
May I be present before I am concerned with being anything else.
May I breathe peace in, and breathe love out.
May I meet others with kindness and acceptance and still keep my boundaries.
May I feel confident enough in those boundaries to be flexible in my actions.
May I use my words for good.
May I be grateful.
May I trust.
May I be open to what the Great Spirit knows is for me, and may I walk my path accordingly, as if with every step, I am waiting on my next instructions.
Something I’m thinking about
Taking more art classes.
And that thing I just said about waiting on my next instructions — I added it to my intention about being open to what the Great Spirit has planned for me. When I feel myself in flow, I feel like that — like every step is being guided and there’s no rushing, and there’s no procrastinating, there’s just a steady stream of perfectly-placed direction and no need to wonder or worry if its the right one.
Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. — Buddha
Habit
Reading for an hour first thing in the morning.
Best Word or Term
pluviophile: someone who loves the rain or rainy days; an organism suited to a rainy climate.
Wishes
That I recognize every opportunity to feel joy, and that I take each one.
That my fellow creatures do that too.
That you all are content and well.
That you will forward this to one person you think might like it.
Have a wonderful, peaceful, joyous week. And thank you for supporting my work here at The Autotelic.
Peace. Love.
Allison
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I’m loving Capote vs. The Swans. I was really hoping it would be good, and I’m so glad that it is. Naomi Watts is the perfect Babe Paley. I remember reading about the situation a long time ago in, as I remember, Vanity Fair. I have been a fan of Capote since childhood - he wrote such beautiful prose. My favorite is “A Christmas Memory”, a tribute to his cousin “Miss Sook”, who helped to raise him in his mother’s absence. Our local public radio station plays a recording of Mr. Capote reading it every Christmas Eve.
I’ve also started watching Masters Of The Air and every time I watch these series, as an Englishman, I am reminded of the American, Polish, Free French and Czech blood that was spilled in defence of our island in WW2 🙏❤️